All families experience conflict, whether it’s between parents and children, brothers and sisters, etc. There are many sources of family conflict, but some of the most common ones are financial issues, politics, parenting and parenting of younger children. Sometimes family members, despite having similar upbringings, simply have different ways of looking at life. While these conflicts are normal, they can become difficult to live with when they persist and drive a wedge between the people involved. It becomes difficult to remain neutral because you are caught up in the conflict and have difficulty stepping back.
When faced with a family conflict, it is important to put the right strategies in place in order to deal with it and to help maintain favourable relationships within the family. Our psychologists present 3 useful tips to put into practice when dealing with family conflicts.
How to deal with a family conflict?
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Let the dust settle
This is a golden piece of advice, which should always be respected in case of conflict. When faced with anger and negative emotions, we tend to get carried away. This can lead to unfortunate actions or words that go beyond our thoughts. It is important to accept that not all conflicts can be resolved instantly and to take a step back from the situation.
Our psychologists advise us to return to the person(s) with whom we are in conflict, but only when we have succeeded in putting our anger and negative emotions aside. It is then easier to talk calmly, to listen to the other person and to have compassion for their feelings.
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Become aware of the situation
Taking a step back also allows you to get a better picture of the conflict and the situation experienced by the parties involved. We can then ask ourselves about our own emotions, but also whether we understand the other person’s emotions. Ask yourself if you have communicated your view of the situation, the effects it has on you and the emotions it provokes.
In addition, there is sometimes a tendency to put the conflict aside and ignore the anger or sadness you feel. We forget that it is a full-time job to hold negative emotions towards a person. It is a constant emotional burden, and it is important to be aware of the negative energy it causes in our daily lives.
In other words, in order to understand the person with whom we are in conflict and, in some cases, for the resolution of the conflict or for forgiveness to be possible, we must first of all understand our own feelings.
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Get an outside view of the family conflict
Finally, when a conflict persists, when we feel helpless in the face of the situation and when we no longer see a way out, it may be appropriate to consult a psychologist. In fact, a psychologist is not only there for mental health problems, but can also be a good support in case of interpersonal conflict.
A consultation with a psychologist can allow you to take a step back and better understand the issues at stake and thus better position yourself. In a few sessions, one can come back with a new eye on the situation. It is indeed a precious help, like a helping hand to succeed in getting out of the negative spiral generated by the conflict. Sometimes, we get too close to the disagreement and we can no longer see the positive or find ways to solve it. This is where psychological counselling is most relevant.
If you need it, you should know that Clinique GO™ offers online psychology consultation services, which fit perfectly into the management of family conflicts.
Approuvé par Francis Desjardins
